3) Tracy Jordan, 30 Rock — Antonio Cassano
What Tracy Jordan is to comedy, Cassano is to soccer: larger than life, has motivation issues, crazy good (sometimes) at what they do, and, well, basically crazy.
4) Michael Scott, The Office — Diego Maradona
The classic player-to-manager success vacuum. Michael Scott (RIP), great as a salesman, terrible as a manager. Maradona to a tee.
5) Ron Swanson, Parks and Recreation — Gennaro Gattuso
The epitome of all that is man, in both cases. I wonder if Gattuso has a similar love for breakfast foods.
6) The Doctor, Dr. Who — Lionel Messi
Seemingly descended from a race of superbeings, he stands for all that is right and good in the soccerverse.
8) Charlie Kelly, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia — Carlos Tevez
The diminuitive wildcard. Throw him in, and you’ll get plenty of effort. Perhaps not to the effect you had hoped.
9) Jimmy McNulty, The Wire — Zlatan Ibrahimovic
Extremely effective, central to successful operations, disliked by his superiors because of his disdain for authority.
10) Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother — Ashley Cole
Really, we could have picked from any one of the womanizing soccer players. How could you possibly cheat on Cheryl Cole? One of life’s great mysteries.